the time of the butterflies is gone

I have this little demon in my stomach
eating from within
hungry for fears
for mistakes
for wishes
and dreams
and weaknesses
it swallows my secrets
it has a huge mouth
and all the food I eat it swallows
and asks for more
it’s growing fast
it’s even got me to eat a huge portion of failure fear today
fooled me into believing that even exists
got me to swallow my own words for fear they might be misread
gets me to swallow air
and sweat
and dust as I go running
makes my fingers tremble
my legs so anxious I get sore muscles while sitting
or trying to, at least
I tried to exorcise it and it’s got even stronger and angrier
I’ll try my luck and love it tonight


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